As I embark on this new journey living a life without depLiving a life without depression, fear, and other demons that have tormented me since my youth.

I am entering a season of life that is foreign to me. A season of peace and little to no oppression, little to no chaos.  This kind of life is very foreign to me, and I am looking forward to it!  No more babies crying, no more boys getting into trouble in school, no more boys fighting in my home, putting holes in the walls from wrestling.  No more struggling to make sure the kids aren’t hungry.  Working 3rd shift, leaving my teenage boys at home so I could work to keep food in the house.  Oh boy, the list goes on and on, and I have stories that I can tell for a couple of lifetimes. 

My past life was the life of a single mother raising four boys and one girl, struggling not to be a statistic in this dark, cold world, filled with chaos, fear, oppression, confusion.  Struggling mentally, financially and emotionally, while not understanding what life is really about, and fearfully trying to make sure we have provisions for the day and tomorrow.

Constant battling in my mind, while trying to ignore the crazy thoughts and suggestions to give up and to take myself out of this game called life, I buried my depression, while raising my children and working a full-time job,  I never expected to make it out of that long season of being a single parent.

Now that that season of life is over, the children have grown up, and a couple of them have children of their own.  I now have an 18-year-old daughter preparing for adulthood.  Preparing to introduce herself to the world in less than a year. She is ready to put her stamp on life. She is prepared to be a head crusher for Christ and dominate whatever she puts her hands to.  

Now is the time to step out on faith and begin my endeavors. All of the things I’ve always wanted to do.  Now I have a story to tell, while encouraging others, amongst other things. However, I began having these negative thoughts. No one wants to hear your story.  It’s all a lie, no one is going to take you serious.

I have never felt like an adult. I feel like a little girl making adult decisions in an adult body, with no guidance, no direction, or plan or strategy, just a hope that I will succeed in life (whatever that means).  

All the years I have fought to get to where I am now. I never expected to actually see it.  When going to faith to faith and glory to glory, some seasons are longer than others.  How long it takes you to learn the lesson can determine how long the season is. 

Now, here I am at 48, and I still battle the remnants of depression, but this time, I know how to fight back and overcome.  The secret is out! I know what the enemy stole from me, and I want it ALL back 100-fold.  He tried to steal my future and destiny.  He lied to me and told me I wasn’t good enough.  He told me I don’t deserve to be here and that I’ll never be anything.  Well, I am not a failure; I am an overcomer.  I was born to win.  I have the power to leap over walls, to run with the horseman.  If it becomes an idea in my mind, then I have everything I need to accomplish it. I have the grace of God to carry it out unto completion.  

1 Corinthians 2:9 says eyes have not seen, ears have not heard, neither has it entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for him that love him. I had to tell myself that now was not the time to give in to that voice. I do deserve to be here. I am who Christ says I am. Now is not the time to be taking suggestions from the enemy. Now is not the time to give negative words power over me.

Now is the time to destroy the fear, chaos, disappointment, and demolish the setback, oppression, poverty, and struggle in my life.  They are no longer my lot. My past is my past.  Everything I did in the past that was not pleasing to Christ. I have repented and asked God for his forgiveness. I had to remember who I was back then; I am not that person anymore. I am a new woman in Christ Jesus.  I faced my demons, and I overcame.   I know Jesus paid the price for our sins over 2000 years ago when he died on the cross to save us.  He paid it all.  No longer do we have to live in condemnation; our freedom is in Christ Jesus. 

Since you are a new person in Christ Jesus, you ought not waste that opportunity. You have to bind fear and depression. Every time you feel oppression or depression or condemnation rising, try stepping outside of yourself and putting your focus on someone else. There is always someone you can help, pray for, or meet a need for.  Serving is a huge part of healing.  We were created to need each other.  There is no I in team, 

You have to believe and know who you are and whose you are.  You have to be relentless and refuse to live in condemnation.  You have to believe that Christ paid it all on the cross for you because he loves you and cares for you.  He was sent to earth by God to set us free.  Free us from the law, from condemnation, and he had the grace of God to carry out his will.  This was the will of God, his father, our Father who is in heaven.

You have spent enough time in the dark; now that you are in the light, it is time to run on with Christ. It is time to be focused on the things of God. It is time to break down barriers and obstacles, stay focused, and be committed.  You have the grace to move mountains and break chains. Chains of lack and poverty, oppression.

It is time to stop thinking about yourself and step out and help the community. Our life is not our own. Many others are in the same mindset we were. Our story needs to be told.  There are others that need to hear it so they can realize they, too, can break the chain of condemnation. 

No one’s story is alike.  Some are more intense, and some are less; however, our story needs to be told because it encourages others. had to know my story needs to be told.  It won’t be easy. It is a daily mental fight, but I’m ready, and I encourage you to be prepared too. If you would like me to pray for you, don’t hesitate to email me at intsanewme513@outlook.com. You can right-click on this link and leave your request, and I’ll respond.

I’ll leave you with this prayer, and I pray you have Godspeed and success in all your endeavours.

Lord God, anyone reading this post right now, struggling to move forward in who you have called them to be, I plead the blood of Jesus over them. Lord, give them the confidence, the power, and the power to move forward and excel in the life you have for them. In Jesus’ mighty name, amen.